Larimar****s, Stegersbach

The worst wellness hotel ever so far.

Never trust anyone who recommends going to the four star thermal hotel Larimar in Stegersbach/Austria. Don’t do it. Just. Do. Not. Go. There. It may sound harsh but we do care about people who take the time to read our blog, so we’re honest with you guys. But let’s start from… well, from the start.

I mean, seriously. Look at this! You can see how tiny the pool is.

I mean, seriously. Look at this! You can see how tiny the pool is.

The thermal hotel is located in Stegersbach, which is a small village in the south of Burgenland, about a 90 minutes drive away from Vienna. The Larimar’s website advertises with “elegant and luxury rooms”, “delicious meals” and “superior service”. So let me tell you how me and my friend experienced our stay there. First of all: We arrived after work, which was Friday around 7 pm. As check-in times in hotels are usually in the morning, we let them know ahead of time that we’ll arrive that late. When we finally got there, we just parked our car in front of the hotel and proceeded to the reception. The (very young) guy there was nice, but not really very service-orientated. He did not tell me where to park the car or anything, we had to ask. He made no offerings of whatsoever to help with our luggage. We had to ask for that. Which is a no-go in a hotel that charges you about 300 USD for a double room per night and claims to be 4-star superior. And boy, you could tell how not-amused the lobby boy was to deal with our two mini-bags (as we were only staying for two nights anyway).

We asked in a very friendly way if there’s a chance to still get some food (I mean, it was like 7:30 pm…), and again the answer was friendly, but very clumsy as well. Cause we were told that if we are hurrying up, the cook could make us a toast or something “really quick”. Again: We are not talking about a small pension somewhere in the middle of nowhere; we are talking about a wellness hotel with a lot of beds, charging about 300 USD per room and night.

The room. Big sigh here. Our room was very brownish: It was furnished with all late 80ies looking furniture. There were bathrobes in the room, but as we realized after first using them: Not a single hook to hang your used towels or bathrobes; of course there was also not a towel heater (which should be – in my opinion – a no brainer in a wellness hotel; I mean: you’ve got the towels you used for showering, one for your hair, one for your face, wet bikinis and a wet bathrobe. And not a single hook!!). The room looked really depressing, there was no welcoming treaty or anything like that.

Sad room. Looks A LOT better on the pic than in reality.

Sad room. Looks A LOT better on the pic than in reality.

We were told that we could use the thermal pool until around 10 pm, so we changed into our bikinis and bathrobes (XL, both of them) and checked out the “wellness area”. What we noticed first was that there were signs put up everywhere. One asked guests to not take the hairdryer from the wellness area to their room, to use the slippers provided, to shower before taking a bath, to not close the door too loud, to not run, to… OMG, there was a crappy sign for almost everything. It looked so weird; like you’re old enough to pay for that stay, you’re old enough to drive there but you’ve got to be told not to steal the hair dryer? We felt kidded.

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That’s not style. That’s awkward.

We also visited the sauna area. In the little hallway between the sauna area and the pool area we found four cigarette butts on the floor. No kidding. I wish I would have taken my phone with me to take snaps or pictures of it, but it was out of battery, so I do not have proof, unfortunately. Well, my friend Stephanie was with me and she saw everything I saw and experienced it too. We decided to swim a bit and relax our muscles after the drive. So we showered (we even would have without being told to; suprise!) and then inspected the pool from the inside. It’s in fact a very small round pool that leads to an equally small pool outside. So you have two small, round pools connected to each other.

Amazing how huge it can look with the right angle.

Amazing how huge it can look with the right angle.

What we did not like about the pool area was not only the very small size for a huge hotel like that, but also the fact that the deckchairs were really close to each other. Saturday was really crowded (that’s when we realized how tiny the pools actually were) and we had to overhear all the talks that were going on around us, as the deckchairs were set up really close to each other. There was not a tiny chance of privacy. And there were no tables or whatsoever where we could have put our books and a cup of tea. So you basically have to place the stuff you bring underneath your deckchair.

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Tiny. Not comfy or cozy at all. No privacy.

And that was only the first day! We slept kinda good, the mattress was really soft, but okay for two nights. Day two started with breakfast; something very disgusting, I really have to say. There was a heap of salmon, totally uncooled and sad looking. One of the waitresses was putting cold cut directly from the plastic packaging onto the plates on the buffet. You had to get everything yourself; don’t expect anyone to ask you if you need assistance, let alone bring you a coffee. Everything was arranged in a very unloving way, not at all appealing. And during breakfast we had time to check out the other guests. We were curious, cause all of them looked a bit trailer-parkey (I don’t know how to say that in a nice way). So I googled and found out that you can actually spend your prescribed rehab there – and then you pay only like 30 bucks or something for a night and the whole program. No wonder the hotel gets so great reviews online. I guess it’s just guests who either don’t pay for four stars (and therefore don’t mind if they don’t get the service you would expect) or who never were in the lucky position to experience what a four star establishment really is like.

Ooooh, and now that we’re talking of food, let me tell you about dinner. Sides from me having to order the same drink three times before I actually got what I ordered in the first place (once he brought the juice pure, without mineral water; the second try was juice with tap water, the third apparently number one but three times watered down and almost without any color), it was not pleasant at all. The waiter was slow, did not make any effort to make us feel welcome or ask us how we liked it. We also were not asked about intolerances or allergies. Nobody explained the menu to us. Again: That’s not service. That’s just shitty.

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And that was the prettiest part of the whole buffet!

We were really not satisfied by our stay, so we decided to go back to Vienna on Sunday morning. We did not want to spend an hour longer than we did, because it was just a terrible waste of time. It’s not like I am a spoiled bitch or anything; it’s just that I think everyone should get what they pay for or what they think they’re paying for (like the promised four star awarded hotel). It’s about expectations and fairness. So, cause I am a fair person, I again do advise you to not go to Larimar****s in Stegersbach. Just don’t, okay? I feel like this is the first true and honest review of this establishment; I should get an award for that.

Further Information:
Larimar****s Hotel, Therme, Spa Stegersbach
Panoramaweg 2
7551 Stegersbach
Austria

www.larimarhotel.at

#nogo #warning #review #badhotel #worsthotel #austria #wellness #spa

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